Aklan Mission Trip 2019

Aklan Mission Trip 2019

May 27 – June 2, 2019.

My first ever mission trip – home away from home.

This should have been posted two months ago, pero hindi ako nagkaroon ng chance para isulat lahat ng na-experience at naramdaman ko sa Aklan pag uwi ng Manila galing sa Mission Trip. Or hindi lang din talaga ako nag bigay ng oras para dito, kasi feeling ko, nandito pa rin sakin yung pinaramdam na kagalingan ni Lord, so I’m scared that the overwhelming feeling might be lost once I put it into words.

I am not fond of posting in social media, kasi para sa akin, minsan hindi naman yun basehan para maging valid yung pakiramdam at experience. Nakita ko kung paano nag share yung iba kong mga ka-YFL tungkol sa mission trip nila and sometimes it made me think what if mag post na rin kaya ako? (kasi wala pa sa mga kasama ko ang gumagawa din! Shout out to them!) Pero sa tuwing mag co-compose na ako ng ilalagay, nawawala lahat ng naaalala kong experience. Siguro ayaw kong i-post kasi hindi naman talaga maiintindihan at mararamdaman nung mga makakabasa kung ano ba talaga yung gusto kong iparating.

Maybe it’s because I really don’t want to lose the real meaning of the mission in my heart.


Hindi naging madali ang lahat while preparing for Aklan. Malayo, mahal, ‘di kaya ng budget, wala talagang pera, baka ‘di payagan, nag-eexam ako nun kaya ‘di ako makapag-prepare ng maayos, naisip ko pa, “what if may bagsak ako this sem? Edi lalong hindi ko deserve mag mission.” – lahat na lang ng rason na pwedeng maging hadlang para hindi matuloy, nagamit ko na. Pero mas naging masipag at magaling ang Diyos na gumawa ng paraan at rason sa akin para pumunta, kahit na ako mismo pinanghihinaan na ng loob at hindi sigurado kung matutuloy pa ba ako o hindi.

Sobrang clueless ako sa lahat ng pwedeng mangyari. I know deep inside that I am not prepared. Honestly, I signed up for Aklan kasi naisip ko nun, birthday ko yung unang araw, mae-experience kong i-celebrate yung birthday ko during mission. Indeed, God gave me one of the best birthday experiences. I celebrated it with my mission buddies at the airport. We were delayed for almost four hours, pero hindi namin akalain na blessing pala yun ni Lord para paglapitin kami bago kami isalang sa ibang lugar.

from left to right: Harvey – Kimchie – Mika – Em – Ivan. I am blessed and grateful to have you all as my first mission buddies!!! (let’s go Campus Based!!!)

Beyond the sea breeze of Kalibo was God’s embrace that welcomed us in Aklan, telling us that we made it.

We met the wonderful YFL Aklan. Sobrang nakaka-tuwang balikan yung mga bonding kasama sila, yung jamming, yung mga katuwaan at yung mga activities na ginawa namin magkakasama. We faced different challenges together and more than the purpose of sharing God’s message to them, we were also able to meet new friends. I will always treasure the laughter and the conversations we shared.

Hindi ko na maisusulat lahat ng nangyari mula sa simula hanggang dulo, pero hanggang ngayon, kapag binabalikan ko yung mga araw na yun, hindi pa rin nawawala lahat ng saya sa puso ko. I’ll always remember and keep everything in my heart.

Whenever I feel tired, binabalikan ko yung mga panahon na nagtiwala yung Diyos sa’kin at sa kakayahan ko na mag bigay. Binabalikan ko yung mga panahon na hindi siya napagod ipaalala sa’kin kung sino ako. Binabalikan ko yung mga panahon na tinuloy ko kung saan ako nag-simula.

Whenever I want to run away, forget everything and leave everything behind, binabalikan ko yung katotohanan na wala naman akong ibang mapupuntahan kundi Siya.

Finally, I was able to write something short before this academic year starts. Something to inspire myself for another battle that has been prepared for me. Siguro ito yung dahilan kung bakit hindi ko maisulat lahat ng ‘to noon, kasi ito yung magpapaalala sa’kin na, maging busy at magulo man yung mga susunod na araw, makalimutan ko ‘man alalahanin yung maliliit na bagay, mayroon akong puwedeng alalahanin at balikan.

I may try to run away from His hold, but He will always bring me back home.

Don’t Just Shoo Your Wilderness Season Away

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I had to read the first verse of Luke 4 thrice. It says, “Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, left the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness, where for forty days He was tempted by the devil.”

Jesus, who was full of the Holy Spirit, was led by the Spirit into the wilderness?

Wait, what? Led by the Spirit? Into the wilderness?

I have read this passage before but it was my first time to see that detail. Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness. But why? Isn’t the Spirit, according to Galatians 5:22-23, a source of all goodness, love and peace? How then can Jesus, who was so full of the Spirit, be led to an abandoned or untouched (and assumingly, creepy) place only to face temptations, trials and testings? And it was not just an overnight thing, He was there alone for…

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Purity is a Heart Issue

set out for

I never quite graduate from learning what it means to live with a pure heart. Just when I think I am doing all right in this area, a new challenge appears that reminds me that I am still in the process of becoming the woman God wants me to be.

Few months ago, I had a crush on someone. I particularly admired how he is able to lead others by example – setting the pace in terms of ministry duties as minor as helping others administratively, and as big as encouraging fellow leaders for intensified discipleship. He was only an acquaintance that time so the admiration just came out of an observation. Because we kind of have common friends, it was not too long that we were introduced. And because certain circumstances in the ministry required us to work together, it was not too long that we became friends.


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Setting the Posture 💟

I started 2019 hopeful. I promised myself that I’m going to try and explore new things this year. My last post was three months ago, and a lot of things has happened before I tried to scribble another one, which you are probably currently reading right now.

The path isn’t clear but I know that He is leading me.

I must admit that the past few months have been a bit usual to me. The days have become ordinary. The Second semester of college has started to take over my life, and there were days when I failed to recognize how God has been able to keep me going through the chaos. I failed to reflect whenever I am feeling down. Instead of talking to God I would look down and isolate myself. But I strive to be better during those times. I would still look up, start to pray and thank Him for whatever’s happening in my life.

During those days I experienced so far, my biggest, and most heartbreaking failure. It scared me so much. I thought that I might not be really good at anything. I might just be trying so hard to fit myself into something that is not for me. I might just be scared of not being able to prove anything. That failure must be small to others, but I will keep that experience forever. It serves as my strength to do things better. 

I was given tasks I didn’t know I was able to do. I didn’t know I had an eye to look for things deeper with meaning. I didn’t know I was able to appreciate colors beyond their use. I was not even aware of my capabilities.  

Rejections, frustrations and, disappointments also came with me along the way. “Hindi naman tayo ganito dati,” I said to myself. I was looking up there, asking God if it’s really his plan working or mine. It was so tiring to sleep and wake up feeling drained. I would just want to turn everything down and choose to isolate. I chose where to put my emotions and I keep them away whenever it isn’t needed. I hated talking to other people because I thought that they might just take everything I say for granted. I chose who to trust. I realized during that time that being with different people could be possible, but trusting only a few is a must. You can’t fully trust a person with your heart just because you’re on the same page of the situation.

I have been really disheartened from the past few months. I tried to maintain my gullible side because I want to protect my feelings. I trusted only one person because I know I’ll get through it with Him.

So, I started to rebuild and restart quietly.

Watching Korean dramas has been my hobby since I was a teen. Finishing three 20-episode series straight never made me feel so happy. I don’t know why I found myself so happy even if watching series isn’t new to me. I also started to loosen up by listening to the music I really liked before. I talked again to the people I haven’t caught up with for a long time. I read stories, did childish things on my own, entertained myself with lame jokes, watched memes, slept a lot and laughed a lot.

I listened to different stories, took down notes and prayed for them.

I appreciated small things and recognized everything I have even if I am losing.
I tried to smile more. I made a list of the things I want to do and the things that I hate and I cry about.

I did not focus on the people and things that make me sad.

I prayed for it instead.

Even if there are times that I fail to reflect and pray.

What could be the posture of my heart, then?

Grace. Trusting that everything is grace. Trusting that there could be more beyond the struggles and there’s beauty in it.

If you’ve lost yourself along the way, probably it is because the posture of your heart has been shattered. The only way to bring it back is to remind yourself of who you are before you encountered a lot of things. Remind yourself of the things you always loved to do and remember why you are currently in that position. Slow but still in progress. Recognize small achievements and appreciate little efforts. Give way to changes and embody acceptance. Cry it all with your heart’s content. Give space for yourself in your heart. Remember that the only important opinion when it comes to yourself is FROM YOU. However, be open to corrections and learn to embrace your mistakes. Pray for every decision you make and include God in every step you take.

These things might be so easy to say. I am not being righteous, and I still have a lot to improve on my own. These things might just help you as to how it helps me to improve myself. I am still identifying how to work on things gracefully and wholeheartedly. Being on the state of grace is a long process and I’m trying to find my way to get there. Eventually, I’ll get there. You too. You’ll get there.

What 2018 was ✨


I graduated from high school, turned 18, started pursuing my dreams, started to serve God in a different and surprising way, met a lot of people, experienced a lot of things (blurry paths and changes) that I never thought I would be able to endure. I slowly discovered myself, the things that I like and slowly remained in silence as I started to discover the real meaning of ‘worth’. God taught me to slowly take risks, accept the things that are happening in my life & learn from it. All of these are only possible because of the people around me, and the grace He’s given that flows within me. I am becoming a better person because of this and I pray to seek for more until it fully suffices my need to give more and love more.

Image may contain: Millen May Arellano, smiling, tree and outdoor

may 2019 be filled with love, sincerity, patience, new adventures, and new people that will help me build my character, spirituality and memorable relationships to be treasured forever. I am also looking forward that this year will be filled with growth and be granted with a room for change and improvement.

Cheers to a hopeful 2019!

photo was taken last January 2018. (📷Alyssa De Ocampo)